Month: September 2003

It’s been a long day. Much of it not good and I don’t know how any of it is going to change. I’ve got a lot on my plate tomorrow and while I know where to start with some of it but for a lot of it I’m going to be running around in the dark. Still some of it should be fun.

Not likely.

Um it’s pretty much the embodiment of same shit different day these days. SSDD. I’m tired, stressed and overworked. I’m possibly worried more about stuff than I should be but I have a horrible feeling I’m badly fucked but I think it’s just an over reaction to everything going on.

Friendster is taking off again thanks in no small part to V Idol which is exactly what it sounds like. Went from 8k in my network to 80k just by adding a small amount of the V folk.

I have to find something to do. Some sort of actual hobby, preferably something which keeps me out for a while but also does not break the bank.

No reading tonight, straight to bed shortly. This morning I don’t remember turning off my alarm. I remember waking up pretty much in a panic thinking it was late in the morning. Turns out it wasn’t but it was enough to have me run a little late. This whole train business is great tho. I was home after having been to the shop for dinner and walking from Clapham Junction by 6.50 tonight. I’m usually lucky to be in by that time. Drop the walk and shop and I could have been home by 6.30. It’s all good.

No dreams lately, just too tired I guess. Some random thoughts about people I knew lifetimes ago and yes a few longings for such lifetimes ago leading to that thought, if you could start over again “a million miles away” ( I just watched the video for Hurt) what one thing would you change?

I haven’t got a fucking clue. I can think of three major things off the top of my head and more every second I think about. Hmm no regrets and all that crap eh?

So to break things up, here are some lyrics. They are from the excellent collaboration between The Chemical Brothers and The Flaming Lips; Golden Path.

as i walked along
the supposed golden path
i was confronted
by mysterious spectre
he pointed to the graveyard
over on yonder hill
I paused in cosmic reflection
confused on wondering
of how i came to die
hm…
i was confused
coz if i was dead
how and why did i die
and i composed myself
and decided i should face it

then i stood paralized
on the supposed golden path
and i was confronted
by powerful demon force
and there was the devil
and we spoke his words
flowed like glowing lava from the mouth of a volcano
and i said:
help me, lord!!
i found myself in some kinda hell
but i did not believe in heaven and hell

world in opposites kind of reality
but i gained control of myself
and decided to press on

as i walked along
the supposed golden path
I was trembling with fear
all the lions and the wizards yet to come
i seen in the distance
silver mountains rising high in the clouds
and a voice from above did whisper
some shining answer from the moon(?)

please forgive me
i never meant to hurt you

Diet coke taste like piss.

I was too cold in the office earlier.
I am now too hot.

Fucking typical.

Man I’m fucked.

I went to bed early last night as I was tired and decided to read for a while. Of course this lead to me reading until 02.15 to finish The Player of Games. The narrators identity was pretty obvious but I liked the actual ending of the game. All in all a good read and onto the next one this morning.

Played alot of Blood Bowl last night, it was fun. Got a win in aswell (at last). Getting a new team set up for a tournament to start tonight but I could just sleep. (Ha that’s likely).

Metallica tickets for Earl’s Court go on sale tomorrow. So far four of us are heading to it with a probably fifth. Looking forward to it lots. They were awesome at Download and they should be awesome again.

There is a cold going around the office, and I think I might be coming down with it..or I’m stressed and overly tired. One or the other..or maybe both.

I have a meeting now. Then lunch, then an hour’s work and then 3 hours of phone calls. Man when did my job get so busy?

Stressed.

I’ve got about 6 projects on the go now, one of my new ones is big enough to have it’s own listserv and name for big tracking and of course one of the bugs is that it does not work on XP yet. Guess what I’m using?

Emails are getting out of hand lately, I’ve had to send 7 fairly heavy ones before midday today and only some of them were replies. So more due in my inbox soon enough which is good as I need some info and bad as I’m gonna get hammered. I’ve just inherited another two calls a week and it’s all adding up.

Tired, didn’t get much sleep last night. Read for a while, quite late actually. I’m enjoying the fuck out of The Player of Games the second Culture novel from Iain M. Banks. So very glad I picked up the third aswell yesterday.

Listening to some live Springsteen today, it’s all good. Dug out Talk on Corners by The Corrs this morning for the train journey and was pleasantly surprised by how well it played.

Still not managed to watch any movies, might try and do so tonight but not been very successful doing that so far. Then again might go sit in the coffee shop and read for a while, I think that could be quite good. The plan for lunch is either going to be chess with Dave…the plan for lunch is indeed chess with Dave.

Going to have to see the Earth From the Air again and buy that book, it just has to be done.

And of course typically the project I inherited comes right around to bite me. One of these days I’ll just refuse.

The Chemical Brothers teamed up with Wayne Coyne, lead singer of The Flaming Lips put out The Golden Path today and it’s fucking ace.

Right.
Went out and got to the Science Musuem. Decided that I did not want to rush around the exhibt so I just wandred around the rest and I’ll come back for the full Titanic one. It was a lot more than I was expecting but I’ve been to the Smithsonian and nothing compares to that.

As I was walking past the Natural History Museum, I say they have an outdoor exhibt of prints from Earth from the Air so I spent a good hour wandering around taking in the sights. I’ve seen so little of this world. It was nice to be able to recognise the shot from Toyko. Most of them are stunning pictures and just a few are breathtaking.

I got the next two Culture novels and have started off The Player of Games. Met up with Nick and we went to Rileys for the night to play some pool. It wasn’t my best showing but I came back well enough.

Came home and lost a quick (70 min) game of BB. More players needed!

Playing with webcams during the week, was very impressed with the quality so far. Gotta actually go with some proper conferencing this week and see how all that goes.

And finally the answer to this article is HELL YES.

Right, I’m taking a day off this week and I’m going to go and see The Titanic exhbit and bum around the Science Musuem for the afternoon. Blonde closes on Friday and I missed the offer so I might just go for the full price.

I’m sorta watching the MTV video awards while waiting to kick off some Blood Bowl. It is worth noting that Pamela Anderson is not cute.

Actually sod all that, the Science Museum is about 2 miles away and open till 6 tonight. I think I shall go have a gander shortly.

a good night, a very good night. Some quick notes.
– Goth chicks are awesome.
– Getting wound up about goth chicks is not so awesome.
– it’s a damn small world.
– I have some Johnny Cash playing 🙂
– Finally got my hair cut. Andy reckons it is about a foot shorter, I had at least 2/3 chopped off. I was so tempted to just go in and ask for a 2 on the back and sides.
– Smoking is bad.
– Gonna have to hit a book shop tomorrow, I need some more Culture books.
– I want to watch Batman again.
– Might get some comics tomorrow.
– Sleeping late will be happening.

Gah I wanted more, but not tonight it would appear. Tomorrow…maybe.

I would appear that there is quite a difference between the emails going to my account and the stuff I’m actually getting. I’ve just been goind through my webmail and found two mails which I had not seen before which I had been wondering about. Strange.

Slept well (mainly) last night and until late today. These are both good things. Meeting up with a couple of the lads in The Ship. Couple of Saturday’s ago when I ran into the V lads in town, later on in the evening, Andy brought us up to the ship. First impression was that is a nice enough pub, fairly busy but nothing special. Given how much Andy loves the place I asked him about it. He just pointed upwards. And I look up and see nothing, but I hear music. Nirvana, Faith No More, Rage Against The Machine, The Red Hot Chilli Peppers and the list goes on. Indie & Alternative music heaven. So a start off there tonight before hitting Waxys for the full night.

Not sure what to do about food. Getting out of bed, having a shower and going for a local fry up sounds like a good plan but also going into town and having food sounds good.

Gah, just plain gah.

I was going to type but then I thought better of it. I shall type some tomorrow maybe.

I had a really weird dream this morning. I dreamt that someone I knew years and years ago came to work at the same company and I dreamt about the reaction that could cause. It was strange.

Tonight was fun, yet close to bad. As the phrase came earlier (and from me), we are men on the edge. Lucky for all, tis not that much on the edge…but it was close.

2 years by the way, nice one…I think.

Good night.