{"id":3967,"date":"2002-10-03T20:00:00","date_gmt":"2002-10-03T20:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/2002\/10\/03\/humour\/"},"modified":"2002-10-03T20:00:00","modified_gmt":"2002-10-03T20:00:00","slug":"humour","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/2002\/10\/03\/humour\/","title":{"rendered":"Humour"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A team of scientists have taken the past 4 years to come up with the conclusion that the following is the worlds funniest joke:<\/p>\n<p>Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn&#8217;t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services.<\/p>\n<p>He gasps: &#8220;My friend is dead! What can I do?&#8221; The operator says: &#8220;Calm down, I can help. First, let&#8217;s make sure he&#8217;s dead.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: &#8220;OK, now what?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I am less than impressed. I am much more impressed with the funniest joke in Europe which did make me laugh. It is:<\/p>\n<p>A patient says, &#8220;Doctor, last night I made a Freudian slip, I was having dinner with my mother-in-law and wanted to say: &#8216;Could you please pass the butter?&#8217;<br \/>\n&#8220;But instead I said: &#8216;You silly cow, you have completely ruined my life.'&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>However the folks at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.grammarporn.com\/\" title=\"\" onmouseover=\"JavaScript: self.status=''; return true;\" onmouseout=\"JavaScript: self.status=''; return false;\">Grammarporn<\/a> tops both of these quite easily, but be warned the humour is a little <b>risqu\u00e9<\/b>:<\/p>\n<p>Q: What do you get when you stab an infant with a kitchen knife?<br \/>\nA: An erection.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A team of scientists have taken the past 4 years to come up with the conclusion that the following is the worlds funniest joke: Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn&#8217;t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/2002\/10\/03\/humour\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Humour&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3967","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3967"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3967"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3967\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3967"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3967"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3967"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}