There are a couple of lines in True Love Waits<\/i> by Radiohead which I was reminded of yesterday.<\/p>\n
I’m not living
\nI’m just killing time.<\/p>\n
It struck a chord. I’m in that kinda feeling at the moment. I’m existing, I’m not living. Looking around nothing is how I want it to be. I’m not really happy in anything that I’m doing. More and more I’m looking for an escape out of my little world, a couple of weeks ago it as crime novels, the last couple of weeks its been music and all the time in the background there are comics. <\/p>\n
The thought of everything being status quo tomorrow isn’t a new one, its always been like that. I’m am amazed that it is now September. I imagine I am not alone in thinking that it cannot be coming to a year on from the events of September 11th but it is. Another year of my life has passed and I haven’t really got all that much to show for it. The thought that I have over forty years of working ahead of me is not a nice thought, the very thought it could be where I am now is just unacceptable. I don’t even know how that would work if and when I progress up through the company.<\/p>\n
For the past six weeks or so in my local tube station there has been an ad up for people wanted to crew a six week around the world sailing event. I stopped to note down the details during the week. The idea of quitting my job and going and living that life for a while is so very appealing. I actually did give it some serious thought. Unfortunately I suspect their first criteria for crew would be a high level of fitness so that excludes me already.<\/p>\n
I know I’ve said this before, maybe not here but to myself anyway; I want more education. I want to learn about stuff I use to think it was computers these days I’m not so sure. I don’t honestly know what I want to do. Getting a piece of paper of some sort is important to me. It might be a misplaced goal, but it was something I should<\/b> have done before and I didn’t. <\/p>\n
I studied some psychology in my time in college and it is something that has always fascinated me. Realistically its not for me, I don’t have the people skills to even start and I’m no where near smart enough to go and do it…actually that last one might not be true but don’t have in any way a good memory and I believe that would hold me up. But the reason for this line of thought is college term is coming up and I’m pretty close to qualifying as a “mature student” (at least by Irish requirements anyway) and I really do mean go to and look into that over here. To go somewhere at night and actually do a course and get a formal qualification would just rock. I think I’d be better at it now. I think I’d actually sit down and do the work required but I’m just not sure. Still if I fuck up this time, at least it will be my problem and me loosing money. Note to self check out some websites about it during the week. If I could sort something out to start in this college term that would be really really cool. Note to self talk to some work people about this in the morning too.<\/p>\n
I’m pretty damn sure I’m too young to be having a mid-life crisis.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
There are a couple of lines in True Love Waits by Radiohead which I was reminded of yesterday. I’m not living I’m just killing time. It struck a chord. I’m in that kinda feeling at the moment. I’m existing, I’m not living. Looking around nothing is how I want it to be. I’m not really … Continue reading “I know who I want to take me home.”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4082","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4082"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4082"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4082\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4082"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4082"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davebushe.net\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4082"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}